Radar Jockey Dot Net

I’m kind of a tech geek, gadget freak, whatever you want to call it. I don’t have it as bad as some people, but I likes me some electronic gadgets. Anyway, I’ve owned a Garmin Nuvi 660 portable GPS for a while now and used it in three different states with great success. The freedom and time saving a good navigator brings is something you don’t really grasp until you use one. There’s no looking up addresses on Google Maps and getting driving directions, or God forbid, getting out a paper map and manually calculating a route to a destination. In the car, you don’t have to constantly consult those directions or the map while negotiating traffic and turns, and deciding to go get some dinner or go to a movie while in unfamiliar territory is as easy as punching up the nearest suitable in the database of the unit and pressing “Go!” Unfortunately, there is a hidden downside. The user is lulled into a false sense of security in relying exclusively on this little gadget to get him anywhere he wishes to go, and then “Wham!” Some unusual road closure or error in the routing logic crops up and bites him hard.

I made a recent trip to New York for Thanksgiving to visit relatives, who live about 60 miles north of New York City on the Hudson. I usually fly into La Guardia in Queens and rent a car to drive north. This would be the first time using the GPS. On previous occasions, I’d managed to get myself somewhat lost getting out of the city, so I was looking forward to a smoother trip this time. I was also making a side trip into New Jersey before heading north, so I was going to rely exclusively on the unit to get me there as well. I had preprogrammed the New Jersey address into the Nuvi before leaving Houston, so once I got my rental car, I just attached it to the windshield, plugged it in, selected the destination, and away I went. Now keep in mind this was Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving Day, in New York City. Mmmmkay.

About the time I crossed the Manhattan Bridge and got dumped into Chinatown in heavy traffic, both pedestrian and vehicular, I started to get a little concerned. You see, the unit came with a trial subscription to a traffic information service that integrates with the navigation to route around traffic tie-ups if it will save you time, or at least give you a warning about delays ahead. I had let that lapse, and here I was watching shoppers on the sidewalk make better time than me. I had no idea if I would have gotten a better route with the service turned on, after all, there was bound to be heavy traffic everywhere, but the fact that I might was gnawing at me as I stared at the bumper in front of me for the next hour or so. There was also street construction so I had to detour slightly around the calculated route, but the GPS adjusted accordingly, accompanied by the somewhat annoying, tinny computer voice saying “re-cal-culating…” OK Hal, try to keep up. I finally figured out it was taking me to the Holland Tunnel to cross under the Hudson River to the Jersey side. I had never been through the Holland Tunnel, so I guessed I would be a tourist. Now imagine four or five major thoroughfares in Manhattan all converging into two lanes to pass through the tunnel a couple miles long. I was starting to understand why traffic was moving so slowly. Once I got through the tunnel, the rest was pretty uneventful, and I arrived at my brother’s house upstate at 5 PM after shopping in Jersey.

Now the trip back to the airport on Saturday proved much more stressful. I had made this same trip many times as well, so I was pretty familiar with it, but since the car rental place was off-airport (so I thought), instead of programming in La Guardia airport, I wanted to put in the address of the rental office. Looking at my contract it only gave some building number at the airport, so that was no help. I searched the points of interest database and found “Avis” on Grand Central Parkway in Elmhurst. Well, I was pretty sure that was the place, so I programmed it in and headed off. Like I said, I was familiar with most of the route. NY Thruway (I-87) south, cross the Tappan Zee Bridge, continue south on I-87 to the Triboro Bridge and the Grand Central Parkway. Being familiar with a route and being familiar with a place are two different things as I would find out. New York City is also a complex of islands and therefore tunnels and bridges are a fact of life and freeways and streets that have been built over a century snake around natural and man-made obstacles like a mass of noodles. Look at a map of the city and it can be pretty daunting to someone who is just visiting and doesn’t know the lay of the land. Now I was putting my complete trust in a little gizmo to get me through all of it.

My first clue that something might not be kosher was approaching the Tappan Zee bridge. I knew it was coming up, seeing it on the display as well as all the signage along the highway. Suddenly, the GPS instructed me to exit to Palisades Parkway south. Huh? My initial instinct was to ignore it, continue across the bridge and let the unit “re-cal-culate” to the route I was sure was the quickest, but then in the back of my head, a voice told me that maybe there was a better way to get to the rental place that was different from going to the airport itself. After all, I had a heck of a time finding the return for another company once that was off-airport when I went to the airport first. So, I took the exit. The drive down the parkway was pleasant, traffic was light and the autumn leaves were still on the trees. It was a nice drive so I started to relax. That came to an end when the parkway ended at the George Washington Bridge.

As far as I know, all the bridges in New York City are toll. That in itself isn’t a problem, but the one I was presented with here was: The way the GPS was telling me to go was E-Z Tag only, or whatever they call the automated toll collection system there in New York State. I didn’t have one of those, and there were little signs pointing me to an alternate route for cash only. So I followed those signs through the surface streets of Fort Lee, New Jersey while the exasperated GPS let out a barrage of “re-cal-culating” prompts as I ignored it’s attempts to get me back on it’s idea of the proper route. I finally made my way through the toll plaza, only to find that the lower level I needed to take to exit on the other side where the GPS was telling me I needed to go, was closed. Grrrrr. So getting to the other side of the Hudson onto Manhattan Island, I had to make a dizzying array of quick exits and tight turns on ramps before I finally got back onto a route that looked like it would get me to a freeway again. Only I had no idea where I was going now. That’s not a pleasant feeling when you’re in New York City. There are at least a few areas there I didn’t want to end up in wandering around lost, if you know what I mean. Another issue was quickly becoming important. Time. It was now looking like I would arrive at the car rental counter an hour before boarding time, with a shuttle ride and TSA security checkpoint in between, and the more I dilly-dallied, that time cushion became smaller and smaller. For a few seconds, I even panicked and thought maybe the car rental place I programmed in was at JFK, and not La Guardia, but a minute later it was apparent I was heading in the right direction.I finally got onto the Grand Central Parkway and I could see the little checkered flag on the display indicating I was close to my destination. Then I saw a sign that jogged my memory. “Gas”. I needed to fill the tank. Crap! I pulled into a little station right there on the parkway, situated as it was I’m sure to cater to the numerous renters like me returning. I topped off, and pulled back onto the parkway, drove about a half mile, and the GPS was telling me I was arriving at my destination. Well, I was right at La Guardia, and no Avis car rental in sight. Argh! All that nonsense just to arrive at the airport itself anyway!

I saw a sign that promised to lead to Car Rental Returns, so I reverted to the ancient art of sign reading to find the place. I ended up circling the terminal drive for 20 minutes before I gave up, pulled over and called the number on the contract to try to get directions. The lady told me to go to Terminal A, and I would see the signs for Avis there. Oh really? How was I supposed to know that? Sure enough, once I got to Terminal A, the signs successfully directed me to the place, which contrary to my memory on arrival, was not off-airport. I complained bitterly to the agent that the signs to return car rentals here were horrible. She agreed, and said the Port Authority would not let them put any more signs up than what was already there. How nice for visitors which you hope to attract to spend money in your city!

The whole experience will surely diminish the trust I place in my GPS unit to completely rid me of personal responsibility for navigating. I might even have to carry a map. Just in case.